Irina

[Laurasia]

Hi Iseke.

I'm sorry to hear that you've been having such horrible recollections lately. I can definitely sympathize with you about getting nasty recollections a lot of the time. I do know that Benzine is also the German word for "gasoline", so perhaps there is something about the gas vans that you're connected to but haven't remembered yet.

And the recollection about the kidney....wow! Are you sure this was WWII or could it have possibly been from another lifetime? I've had similar recollections which had an overpowering feeling of "this is not medicine" in regards to my lifetime as a Civil War surgeon.

Sincerely,
Laurasia

[Iseke]

Dec 2, 2011 23:15:13 GMT -5 gwida said:

Wow Iseke. Sounds like you've had some pretty darn intense memory recollections.

So you were involved in the French resistance for quite some time?

I wanted to ask you if that dream about "being caught out" if that felt like a "final" dream? Do you feel like your life was shortly ended afterwards, because that's just the impression that I got!
When I was reading your recollections, I felt like they didn't progress in a chronological way "on screen" but after reading all of them on here, I sort of "put them" into a "chronological" order (I know that sounds stupid, but still...)

Like, the adult life the small naked boy then the medical experiments then overhearing the convo. between the two Nazis and finally being led somewhere to await "a fate worse than death" that was sort of how I structured it in my mind. I don't know if that's right though... :S


... ok I'll stop rambling now.

Yes, it's true that I did not get these memories in sequential order, but...

The first one would have been the interrogation, as that is when I was being questioned about my resistance activities, I believe. I'm not sure in what order the camp events took place yet, though.

I was shot to death in the prisoner's revolt. So I was there for awhile.

Laurasia: *hug* Regarding the kidney, yeah, it was definitely the camp it took place in! If not that visual, then certainly the body I saw laid out suggested it took place during WWII.

[Laurasia]

Hello Iseke.

I'm am saddened to hear that you were forced to participate in such experiments. It would have been bad enough just being a prisoner in one of the camp & witnessing such things, but to be forced to participate in them! That's just awful.

You say that you were shot to death in a prisoner's revolt...do you recall which one by any chance? If it was within a camp or a ghetto?

Sincerely,
Laurasia

[Iseke]

*hug* Me too!

The revolt was at Buchenwald.

[msmir]

I am very sorry to hear this Iseke, it must have been extremely stressful to have such horrific recollections. And it must have felt so horrible to be forced to participate in such gruesome experiments... and not have an option to opt out of it. How awful to be forced into something, I mean I really cannot imagine it at all. You have to be thankful in this life you have choices, unlike back then.

[Iseke]

Thank you Mir. Yes, it is very stressful and I know there's more to be dug through, but it explains a lot and some things that have been very deep issues and phobias for me in my life make so much sense now. So I'm thankful for that!