Post by euskanoravian on Sept 12, 2010 17:14:52 GMT -5
Hi. I apologize once again for being absent. I had to recently adjust one of my medication dosages, as a result my sickness got very bad on Friday, and yesterday 
- sorry to mention this, since we have members here who are not comfortable hearing about sickness. But boy, was I sick, and am still exhausted and in pain from all of that. Sadly I did not see much of my middle daughter due to that. I am slightly better today luckily, even though my energy levels are close to nil. In between a bad bout of sickness on Friday, very early morning I went into a trance-like state. That happens to me often while I am dealing with severe nausea and sickness. Perhaps it's an escape mechanism by me dissociating myself from the ill feelings. Funny enough, many times when I go through that kind of trance, I don't get too many memories, usually. If I do, the memories I have gotten during those trances are of one that happened in my Scottish life. Nonetheless that morning I did get a memory of Heinrich. It was a disturbing one.
I believe this was before Kristallnacht. It was a summer night, and I was in my own apartment being beaten up badly by another Nazi, who I am uncertain of who. The Nazi had his last swing at my jaw, while I had continued to lie there helplessly. I had stopped moaning. He had quickly gotten out of my apartment. I was lying helplessly on my bedroom wooden floor, beside my bed- in pain and bleeding from the beating. I have no idea what happened to trigger him to beat the crap out of me. It is quite likely I had said something to anger him. If that was why, then what did I say to enrage him? Was it something similar to what I had said those few nights to the room full of partying Nazis after Kristallnacht? I would have to think, even if I called him a monster or something of that nature, that it must have not been bad enough to be killed. Then again if it was, possibly he had intended to beat me to death. Maybe he ran out of my apartment because he thought I was dead when I was lying there in a helpless state on the floor. I did manage to helplessly turn over, and start slowly crawling towards my bed, ready to struggle to climb into it while I was moaning and crying. I was in horrible pain, and the end of that memory. After I had grounded, the sickness came back with a vengeance. That memory probably worsened it too.
Now I am really wondering what had happened that night. What did I say or do? What triggered that Nazi to beat me up like that? I know this was during the summer of 1938 in Cologne. I still did participate in Kristallnacht. If I did call him a monster, then it must have blown over, which almost never happened back then. Someone must have had to knock sense into me, because I still lived for a few more months. I now want to know more about that incident. Beatings happened a lot, even among other Nazi and SS members. Nonetheless I want to look more into what had triggered that particular incident. I don't feel it had to do with a fight over a woman, as I did have a devoted girlfriend then too. One day I'll muster up the courage and energy to talk about her. Thanks again, for listening.
Blessed Be,
Andi
- sorry to mention this, since we have members here who are not comfortable hearing about sickness. But boy, was I sick, and am still exhausted and in pain from all of that. Sadly I did not see much of my middle daughter due to that. I am slightly better today luckily, even though my energy levels are close to nil. In between a bad bout of sickness on Friday, very early morning I went into a trance-like state. That happens to me often while I am dealing with severe nausea and sickness. Perhaps it's an escape mechanism by me dissociating myself from the ill feelings. Funny enough, many times when I go through that kind of trance, I don't get too many memories, usually. If I do, the memories I have gotten during those trances are of one that happened in my Scottish life. Nonetheless that morning I did get a memory of Heinrich. It was a disturbing one.I believe this was before Kristallnacht. It was a summer night, and I was in my own apartment being beaten up badly by another Nazi, who I am uncertain of who. The Nazi had his last swing at my jaw, while I had continued to lie there helplessly. I had stopped moaning. He had quickly gotten out of my apartment. I was lying helplessly on my bedroom wooden floor, beside my bed- in pain and bleeding from the beating. I have no idea what happened to trigger him to beat the crap out of me. It is quite likely I had said something to anger him. If that was why, then what did I say to enrage him? Was it something similar to what I had said those few nights to the room full of partying Nazis after Kristallnacht? I would have to think, even if I called him a monster or something of that nature, that it must have not been bad enough to be killed. Then again if it was, possibly he had intended to beat me to death. Maybe he ran out of my apartment because he thought I was dead when I was lying there in a helpless state on the floor. I did manage to helplessly turn over, and start slowly crawling towards my bed, ready to struggle to climb into it while I was moaning and crying. I was in horrible pain, and the end of that memory. After I had grounded, the sickness came back with a vengeance. That memory probably worsened it too.
Now I am really wondering what had happened that night. What did I say or do? What triggered that Nazi to beat me up like that? I know this was during the summer of 1938 in Cologne. I still did participate in Kristallnacht. If I did call him a monster, then it must have blown over, which almost never happened back then. Someone must have had to knock sense into me, because I still lived for a few more months. I now want to know more about that incident. Beatings happened a lot, even among other Nazi and SS members. Nonetheless I want to look more into what had triggered that particular incident. I don't feel it had to do with a fight over a woman, as I did have a devoted girlfriend then too. One day I'll muster up the courage and energy to talk about her. Thanks again, for listening.
Blessed Be,
Andi
How unpleasant.. anything could have set that Nazi off, and I mean anything! If they were rubbed the wrong way, then a temper would have shown in dangerous ways.. it probably was due to something you said or did, but as to what was said or what you did to p*ss him off.. when you are ready to find out I am sure you will! Rest up as much as you can. 
